The 'M' Word

I wrote this a few months before Raffy proposed, when I was grappling with the idea of marrying young. It was always in my plans to 'make something of myself' before I 'settle down'. But apparently, life always surprises you and takes you to where you can grow the most. 


Don't say it. Especially if you’re from the millennial generation, don’t you dare say it. Apparently, that word can only be uttered after you have received a Master’s Degree or a Ph. D., after you have your name framed in corporate halls or magazine covers, after you have a secure bank account. Conceive that idea only when you’ve accomplished everything you’ve ever wanted to in your life, after you’ve traveled the whole world, after you’ve had a few casual dates here and there. Say ‘I Do’ when it’s all that’s left to do.

When you stand by your spouse, make sure his family and friends oohh and aahh at the amazing, ambitious achiever that you are. Society has it drilled into our heads that we have to be a trophy wife to be deserving of marriage (there it goes, I said the word). I told him that. I told him my fears.

Then he said, in a nonchalant manner, in a way that made it seem like he always knew the actual truth: ‘You don’t have to be a trophy wife. We can get that trophy together.’ And in that moment, as I stood stunned, he beautifully summed up the essence of the word we millenials are so invalidly afraid of. All I could think of as I look at my man & as the truth rings in my ears is, ‘God is good.’

Video available to watch here

Photography by Masha Maltsava.